Sunday, July 21, 2013

The cries of the lone twins - cheesy lamentations?

This from a lone twin as a comment to a Guardian article yesterday about lone twine, whose twin died in childhood or adult hood.
As a middle-aged, identical twin who has experienced the real pleasures and traumas of being a twin as well as all the ordinary pains and joys of life with ordinarily loving and hurtful family members, I resent the self-pitying claims of bereavement made by people who 'felt something was missing' then found they had been a twin pregnancy (er...ever heard of the human condition...existential angst...etc etc?). You cannot miss what you did not have. Yes, you can desire something that you think will make your life better or make you feel better about your life (consumerism is based on that gap), but please, don't insult those of us who have lived with and lost our twin with your cheesy lamentations.
Here is the comment

I left the following comment:
When we think of lonely twin-less twins, whose twin died in childhood or adulthood, we should also think about womb twin survivors, whose twin died before or around birth. They are lone twins too and have feelings of loneliness and isolation, but their feelings are not generally accepted as real because their loss happened to early in life, or around birth. It's time for everyone to realise that the loss of a twin, regardless of when it happened, is a major blow to the sole survivor and has a profound and lifelong effect on them.
Womb Twin, based in St Albans, Hertfordshire, is a non-profit organisation that provides information, help and support to many hundreds of womb twin survivors around the world. Thank you for this article - it is time for all lone twins to be recognised as a significant group in need of support, and not in any way "weird," "neurotic" or even strange.

Dear reader: Its not difficult to leave a comment of your own.  Perhaps if as many of you as  possible could do that, it may help to silence the sceptics like the twin quoted above, who has not experienced the loss of his twin and is hardly in a position to comment.

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