Friday, April 29, 2011

Womb twin kids (3) My parents got it exactly right!

As I have a house full of guests arriving soon to celebrate the wedding of Prince William to his lady love, Catherine Middleton, it is absolutely right to make a truly celebratory blog post today!

What could be better than an interview with Monica Hudson, who is the US Womb Twin rep.and who manages the USA womb twin blog,  with a womb twin survivor is well adjusted to the fact that he is a womb twin survivor - no Black Hole for him.

[Read the interview in full on the World wide Womb Twin blog.]

Here is a snippet for you,  plus my thoughts in relation to the Womb Twin Kids project.


As a follow up to Part 1 of this interview (posted on April 7), here concludes this very special interview with a womb twin survivor who lost his female twin at birth, and is quite fine with it. He is convinced he was spared traumatic affect due to his mother's early acknowledgment and constant communication about the loss of his twin.

Consider what he shares - about a subject never spoken about with people other than his mom - an early Mother's Day tribute to the incredible instincts his mother had not to repress the loss. Let this also be a tribute to the current & future mother's of womb twins to overcome their apprehension and fears and learn to talk about it with their children. When you handle it well, your child will too. Ignoring it doesn't make it go away, it makes it much worse.

What advice would you give parents of womb twin survivors on how to handle this well for their children?
I wouldn’t evade it or negate it, I’d definitely talk about it. It’s something that did happen.

How early would you bring it up?
I would talk about it from when you brought the baby home. I remember it was a pretty early memory that I was a twin and my mother was talking to me about it, by doing that she comforted me and that’s what you want to do.

Do you feel that if she told you later in life that it would’ve been shocking rather than always growing up with that knowledge?
Sure because you set a tone with a child in exposing it to any kind of information or knowledge. If you do it later, it could be more of a shock and less embraceable. You might have difficulties developing that knowledge.

Whereas if you get it earlier, it’s just integrated into who you are?
Yes and then you have more of a possibility of developing that knowledge and nurturing it into a positive manifestation.

For instance, my mother was a great artist and she chose not to teach me that when I was very young. She taught me when I was 9 or 10 and it was hard for me to assimilate that information and I was kind of upset because I wish she did teach me earlier. To use an example, prodigies like Mozart who are taught & exposed to information at a young age can assimilate that information much easier, you don’t have to think about it too much. You’re just doing it. It’s like walking and reading and talking.

How would you suggest the subject be brought up?
Just talk. There’s no right way or wrong way…but the wrong way is not doing anything about it all. If parents are fearful and apprehensive… look, a child only wants to share with you and other people, the more sharing and conversing is done, the more adulation and love is created. And the more love and adulation, the more intelligence is developed and the greater the perception. And that’s all that beings want is that camaraderie - all species, that is the first act of communication. Just going through the motions of eating and getting up in the morning, they emulate those things. So when you start talking about things, they’re going to emulate those things.

When you do it while they're young, as a parent to a child, you’re going to do it in a positive way for the most part because you’re enamored by this new being. You make it up as you go, there are no instructions on how to rear children even though there should be, but you know there are right ways and wrong ways of doing things and anything that is done in a positive, loving manner can’t be bad.

If you don’t know what you’re doing and you think you’re doing it wrong, it still can’t be bad because you figure it out as you go. And not only do you figure it out, the child figures it out, you help each other. It goes back & forth. It’s a given that the teacher learns more or just as much from the student. The master really learns from the student if he’s a good teacher. And that is a very high acknowledgment in a very sagely manner, it’s not easy to do and people who are masters and have acquired that sagely manner are aware of that. That’s what you want to manifest in and it can take a lifetime to learn to do that.

Or you can just do it…as your biological being tells you to do. And if you follow those things, sometimes you can learn a lot more than you knew you could.

A truly remarkable mother! Bless her!

( And thank you to Monica and her womb twin survivor friend.)

The Womb Twin Kids project is all about encouraging that loving openness between parents and young womb twin survivors.  I am building a special web site, available soon, but in the meantime there are a few pages here, including a contact form for parents of womb twin survivors who would like to help with this project by sharing their experiences.

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