Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Womb Twin story: He can't deny it any more...

I have always felt....different. Almost like everyone else is the same and I'm not. I'm empathetic, more so than any other man that I've seen. I am straight, but can understand and identify with women (which is why I believe I had a twin sister).

I grew up having many nightmares of the dead rising and chasing me, so throughout life I have bombarded myself with zombie films and books to kind of desensitize myself from it.

What few pleasant dreams I did have were of a little girl. She seemed to be growing up with me and at first I thought she was the women I was to meet in life for marriage. I had a deep, unconditional love for this women so I had assumed that's what it was. I have since come to realize that that's really not the case and it's something else.

Personality wise, I'm very un-emotional on the surface. I show little expression and most tell me that I look upset or mad, even if I feel in a good mood.

I've been an excellent judge of character upon first meeting people and I have no idea where it comes from. I just know, which always proves to be accurate. I always get told that I have a great potential, but never use it like I should. I was easily bored in class and although I appeared to wander off to my teachers, I could repeat what they had said verbatim.

Everything I accomplish in life seems to never be enough. I always feel.....unfinished.

I spoke to my mother today and asked her if she had any strange things happen when she was pregnant with me. She told me she bled a lot early in the pregnancy and that I was born at 11 months. Upon my birth it was discovered that I was also Iron deficient. I did not ask anymore about it other than "did you suspect ever having twins in either pregnancy?"

She said she thought mine was, but ultrasound was not in wide use during the seventies so there is no way to be sure. I have a lot more, but nothing else off the top of my head. It has taken me a long time to even discuss this topic, but I've gotten to the point that I can't deny it anymore. I hope this helps.

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