This is one mother's perspective on a vanishing twin pregnancy. It does make clear that there should be no harm to the sole survivor, who we know will be intelligent, sensitive and possibly an unusually gifted child.
It is important for parents to bear in mind the possibility that their little child is carrying a vague memory of something missing. This is why we started the womb twin kids project.
Its very important for parents to start talking about the missing twin when their sole survivor is very young.
This special little book can help. It's about two little birds who hatched out of the same egg, but only one of them was strong enough to fly...
What do you think? Should parents ever mention it or would it be best to stay quiet on the subject?
If the parents know about the missing twin, they should always tell the remaining child about it, as soon as it is appropriate and the child is old enough to understand. It will save a lifetime of misery. The child will always sense that something is wrong, and possibly even the presence of his/her twin. It is something that can never be ignored.
ReplyDeleteThe child will know. Ignoring it won't help. I thought I was crazy for 10 years asking for my sister. My parents told me I didn't have a sister until my mom was pregnant when I was 10 years old. She then told me about my sister. It was a huge relief for me.
ReplyDeleteI think if the parent knows for sure there was a twin, this should be shared with the survivor at an early age. If there's no prrof, maybe it should wait until the child is old enough to understand, but of course the child will already know. It's just a huge relief to find out you aren't crazy or different in a negative way!
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