The womb twin work

I spend a lot of time explaining my way of working - its been a problem for some time.

The secret purpose of the womb twin survivors is to remain in the black hole - ie not develop, never get off the ground, remain in a state of arrested development etc.

There would be loving and logical reasons for this: " I must stay here with my lost twin and not develop either".

If someone I am working with draws out of me a series of explanations, directions and suggestions by their own resistance, then they stay helplessly stuck, in the black hole with their lost twin.

In other words the process for the womb twin survivor is to hand over autonomy to the therapist and let them take control - but this seems illogical. However if the secret purpose is to remain the beta self, then that makes perfect logical sense.

I work in a directive way because this isn't therapy. I don't play the total empathy game (that keeps me helpless in someone elses Black Hole - no thanks.) But I do use empathy informed with understanding on my part so there's a lot of dialogue as I check things out as we go.

I decided it wasnt therapy a long time ago. Its more like teaching but it has a therapeutic aim.

A teacher doesn't wait till everyone is ready to learn but rather assumes that the person is there to learn. There is no point in coming to a teacher and then resisting the very process of learning. But that's not quite it for me, when it comes to the womb twin work.

A therapist stays with the client in their inner world and accepts as truth everything going on there. In absolute empathy and kindness, working with the resistance. But always aware of unconscious process and transference. But that's not quite it either.

What I do is first to inform with empathy, then listen with open-mindedness, then guide as seems appropriate , then fearlessly negotiate a way forward that suits the individual, all the time emphasising the fact that the individual is in charge of their own healing.

We found a name for it this morning : therapeutic guidance for wombtwin survivors.

I wonder: is this what womb twin survivors experience? Is this what they need? This is what I have learned to do over the last five years or so. It is what I intend to do, but intention may not be enough. I am self taught and have no teachers, other then the womb twin survivors I work with.

I would welcome comments and suggestions.

Article about therapy with womb twin survivors