Healing (3) Despair

You spent several months alone in the womb after your womb twin died. Your feelings of despair were created then. The nature of your despair that arises out of your Dream of the Womb varies according to the circumstances of your womb twin’s death.

HOPE
Despair is the absence of hope. This can arise out of a sense of hope being dashed. In the Dream of the Womb, the tiny person who was moving actively nearby seemed to promise a relationship that would be as close as close can be, but the promise was broken by death. That sense of dejection and being disheartened suggests a bitter disappointment. In the Dream, the hopelessness that is a large part of despair is an echo of the long, long wait for your womb twin to respond.

New Youtube movie : The black hole

Take a look at my new movie! Comments welcomed.

The Black Hole - a poem for womb twin survivors

The black hole

The black hole is death and dissolution, entrophy and ecstatic union with emptiness.

The black hole is pain and terror and the darkness of non-being.

The black hole is power, essence, and the majesty of God-in-me

The black hole is energy and creativity centred into a split second of life giving.

The black hole is a teacher, to fear and yet live, to live and not to fear to die.

Come with me now into the black hole and you and I may come to rebirth.

Into the black hole: come!

I am calling you back to the place of origin!

Into the black hole; go!

I send you into the dark to find the light!

On the far side after the maelstrom there is power and purity, and the pain of absolute unselfish love.

On the far side, where we may stand, there is  silver light and surrender to the infinite power of simply being.

And when the moment comes to let life go in all its richness, the black hole beckons us, with riches beyond our wildest dreams.

Let us not fear the black hole or attempt to understand-

Let us be open to the goodness and the power that can be ours if we give it way, let it go, and surrender to the breath of life that blows in gales from out of it.

Blown by the breath of God that pours from the black hole, we can live according to  the will of the wind;

And in our last hours feel the suction draw us down into that place of origin and creation that is the place of dissolution and death.

Sink willingly into black hole! It is the cloud of unknowing, filled with ageless mystery : it is the gate to paradise.

If we wait in this holy space together and listen to the silent and mysterious loving power within;

Then truly we will have a taste of paradise this side of death.

Platitudes for the depressed

So Pamela Stevenson (now Connolly) has written some books about psychology.

The one about depression seems to be full of platitudes that get nowhere near the problem.
Here is a a short list of what you can do about depression while you wait for that appointment with a psychiatrist for some antidepressants which will slow you down and nicely blurr the issues and make life liveable again.

• Educate yourself and others round you about depression.
• Make a list of any specific concerns that may be contributing to your depression.
• Try to take care of those things as best you can.
• Make a list of positive things in your life about which you feel hopeful, focus on these things.
• Try to exercise. Try to eat a nutritious healthy diet. Pay a little more attention to your physical appearance.
• Gather support from friends and family. Garner human touch. Don't isolate yourself.
• Create a daily schedule of activities for yourself.

If the individual concerned is capable of any of this then they are no longer depressed. If I knew all about depression and exactly why I was depressed and I was able to do something about it, I would have no problem.
If I was bothered about myself enough to exercise and eat healthily and have friends who hugged me and had a structured meaningful existence I would not be depressed at all.

We dont know about depression. Depression is a mystery. People don't suddenly get depressed, they have a lifelong tendency towards depression. What if depression is grief and loss and terrible sadness and utter helplessness and isolation? What if people with a tendency to depression get platitudes thrown at them and no empathy whatever for how they truly feel?

No one is listening to the wombtwin survivors who feel grief and loss and terrible sadness and utter helplessness and isolation. Call it depression, a personality disorder or what you will, but there is a rational intelligent and loving reason why some people feel this way.

We need to ask those vital questions about the mothers pregnancy!