The healing path. The death of a womb twin

There are many ways in which a twin may die in the womb or around birth.  There are three whole chapters devoted to the death of one twin in my book "Womb Twin Survivors: the lost twin in the Dream of the womb.."

Here is a list

Death around birth

Stillbirth
Neonatal death
Separation of siamese twins
The twins body leaves from the womb during pregnancy

Total miscarriage of one twin
Abortion causing total miscarriage of one twin

What is a womb twin? (4) a miscarried fetus

When a twin is miscarried, there  are two eventualities:

1)  If the twins are dichorionic, that is they do not share a sac or a placenta, when one twin dies the whole conceptus may pass out of the womb via the vagina.

 2) If the twins are monochorionic, or if the placentas have fused,  the body of the dead twin does not leave the womb but remains as a small reminder of what once was, visible after birth, embedded in the placenta of the survivor.

The death of one twin does not usually cause a problem for the sole survivor unless the twins share a chorion, in which case there maybe some problems related to twin-twin transfusion.   In the questionnaire analysis,  it was clear that the miscarriage of one twin was the commonest situation that lead to being the sole survivor, and presumably these pregnancies were dichorionic, as here:

Womb twin survivors can arise out of a variety of prebirth situations, and each situation has a different psychological effect on the survivor.  When one twin dies and passes out of the womb, there is a sense of abandonment;when one twin dies and remains, the survivor is left with  a sense of being only half alive. The Dream of the Womb is based in real events, and is a real memory, only so vague and inchoate it needs a new vocabulary to access.

My new book "Womb twin survivors: the lost in the Dream of the Womb" is my attempt to put words to deep feeling and try to decode the strange  and seemingly irrational messages that arise out of prebirth memory.

NO - you are not crazy, as perhaps you once thought: you are a womb twin survivor!  

For lots more, full references more diagrams and explanations see my latest book.

Signs of a twin conception: (4) miscarriage, but pregnancy continues

The "miscarriage" of a baby involves the expulsion of the baby from the uterus and the end of the pregnancy.  [Download a full explanation here.]  If the loss is in the first trimester, the womb twin survivor usually suffers no physical effects, but in the second trimester there is a greater risk of pregnancy complications.


Jenny was told many times over by her mother that she was a "miracle child", because around 13 weeks of pregnancy  her mother had cramps and bleeding. She passed " something which looked like a little bird".   She went to the doctor, who recommended a D &C. The usual situation is that the pregnant woman waits a week to allow the contents of the uterus to be expelled naturally, but  Jenny's mother decided to go ahead with the D&C.   The next day she was on her way to the hospital but something did not seem right, so she asked for another scan, to be quite sure.  The doctor was surprised to find she was still pregnant and the D&C operation was cancelled.  Jenny's mother had been carrying twins. 

When Jenny was born at 39 weeks - very small at only 3lbs -  she was perfectly healthy.   However, by the time she was about 7 years old she began to feel as if there was something missing.

"I have always felt like I wasn't here, there is something missing in my life but I never know what it is.  I have found life very difficult not knowing who I am or who I was meant to be and everything I do in life doesn't feel right in some way.  I have always sensed something was around me I would have conversations with people who weren't there. I had feeling sand emotions that others never understood. I have always wondered if I am the way I am because I lost my twin."

There is a story of a miscarriage on my web site, from both points of view, mother and child.  I wonder how many babies have been lost because a D&C was carried out after the miscarriage of one twin.  Until scanning in pregnancy became more of a routine, no one would have known that there was a womb twin survivor still in the womb, struggling to survive. 

Also, no one would have guessed with that the loss of that tiny twin would affect the survivor in a psychological way, and still very few people are prepared to believe this.  (90% of the population does not understand.)  Over a thousand people have now completed the questionnaire and the commonest situation they describe (if they have been told about their twin at all) is that their mother thought she had miscarried, but she remained pregnant and a single baby was eventually born - a womb twin survivor.  

When one of your twins has died - what can you do?

I read this today:

I am now carrying a single twin. I only found out one week ago that my second baby had "miscarried," as my doctor put it. I was 15 weeks along, but it appears to have happened close to a month before. I am reeling because of all of this. I have to admit that I have always had a sixth sense about things, but when I feared for one of my babies I tried to tell myself that I was just worrying too much. We were so excited about having twins.

We knew they were fraternal twins and we have the scan to prove it. It was to say the least, devastating news. I knew however that I had to hold myself together for the sake of the surviving twin and my other children. So I began to search the internet for information about what I was going through. I immediately came across the term "vanishing twin syndrome." I was shocked at what I read. I knew that such an occurrence was possible, but never could I have imagined how often it really does happen.

My concern is the effect on the surviving twin. I want to be honest with him/her when the time comes, but I am very concerned about the emotional impact of this. It sounds like from what I've read here that some people realize this without ever being told. I really hate to think of my child suffering throughout his/her life because of this loss. And being tied to something that is not tangible. It is hard enough to grow up strong and independent. Like other parents I just want to protect my baby....It just seems odd to think about communicating with someone...who really isn't there. To feel like someone is a big part of your life who isn't there seems really odd. I wonder if this could be mistaken for schizophrenia? I guess I just need help and understanding. I want to learn how to cope and prepare for when this child gets older.

Mothers should not be left to cope alone with worries such as this.  Why do the professionals not realise how important it is to provide full information and support for mothers who have lost one  twin?

I cant get my book published fast enough. It's almost there.... just a few more weeks.  See here